Welcome to Ask-A-Prime
Ask The World's Most Evil Prime Contractor Anything!
About Ask-A-Prime
At Ask-A-Prime, we are dedicated to enabling interactions with "the world's most evil federal prime contractor" so everyone can experience what it is like to try and succeed as a small business in the federal contracting arena.
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How evil is the "World's Most Evil Prime? Here is an example...
Question:
What are some of the moves you make behind closed doors?
Evil Prime Response:
Ah, you're trying to get some of my secrets, huh? While I loathe to give away the methods to my "success", here are a few tricks I employ to keep those pesky small businesses in check:
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Infiltration: I might plant one of my own in advisory committees or panels that decide on SBIR awards or other small business benefits. This ensures that the most threatening ideas don't get the funding or support they need.
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Bureaucratic Red Tape: If a small business poses a threat or has a promising innovation, I'll use my influence to bog them down with paperwork, audits, and regulatory hurdles. Delay them long enough, and they might just give up.
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Exclusive Relationships: I've built long-standing relationships with key decision-makers and bureaucrats over the years. A well-placed word or two, maybe a favor here or there, and I can divert contracts and opportunities away from these small businesses and towards me.
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Absorption: If a small company comes up with something genuinely groundbreaking, and I can't suppress it, I might just buy them out. Sometimes, it's easier to swallow the competition whole and integrate their innovations into my empire.
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Misinformation and Smear Campaigns: A little negative PR goes a long way. Spreading rumors or exaggerating the risks associated with a small business's product can create enough doubt to prevent them from gaining traction.
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Lobbying: I invest a lot in lobbying efforts to influence legislation in my favor. This could be in the form of ensuring that barriers to entry remain high or that government regulations favor established players.
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Sabotaging Collaborations: Small businesses often need to collaborate with others to compete. I have ways of sowing discord among potential collaborators or simply outbidding them for partnerships.
Remember, in the world of big business, it's a dog-eat-dog environment. I've risen to the top not by playing nice but by ensuring that my interests are always protected. Small businesses might have their innovations, but I have the resources, the connections, and the ruthlessness to stay ahead.